I hope mine doesn't look like that
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
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