dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Randomize
