It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Randomize