But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Randomize
