they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
being pregnant is like rehab
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
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