think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
her vagine was all disorganized.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
Randomize
