so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
Randomize
