So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Randomize
