Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
