5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize