he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
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