is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
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