it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
not ubering you a puppy
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize