i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
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