Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
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