I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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