what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Randomize
