is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
Randomize
