Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
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