More tranny stories later!
hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
Randomize
