she looked like the before picture.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
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