you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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