So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Randomize
