I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
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