So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
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I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
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I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
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