Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
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