I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Randomize
