absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
