was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Randomize
