i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Randomize
