fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
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