When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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