$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
