I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
