Well apparently he's into motor boating.
So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Randomize
