There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
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