She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize