With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
