hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
