Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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