I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Randomize
