At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize