glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize
