plz talk dirty to me
It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
I have grass duct taped all over my body
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Randomize
