How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Randomize
