I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
