I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize