Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
