Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
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