At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
